Stay in this moment and don't fight the discomfort. Stay in this place and be content with the fact that this hurt is not yet healed. It is so easy for me to fight, so easy for me to run from pain, but to stay is to plant. Plant myself in the soil of this day that God has made.To allow myself to be still in this moment, is for me to recognize that the laundry is stacked where dinner needs to be served in a few hours, and not feel the guilt of a poor housekeeper.
This moment is something I need more then the sleepers need to be placed in my daughters drawer, because it has been a week of laundry. A week of this flu bug living in our house and slowly taking each one of us down for at least 24hours. I have washed, cuddle, nursed, comforted, and fed this week. I am comfortable in those roles, I know those tasks, but this business of staying and accepting this moment is something I am learning. This moment of blocks on the floor, a curious toddler on the loose, and bananas who are purposed for banana bread thawing in the fridge.
Friday, July 19, 2013
Thursday, June 02, 2011
Flesh can not mold Flesh
I am part one of a two part marriage. I am character one in two character event. And sometimes I forget that I am not that powerful. I was praying this morning over something that has been on my heart and realized once again that I was trying to force a new attitude in my husband. There is goodwill behind it, but behind the goodwill is my pride.
You can not give another person a nose job by jabbing their nose repeatedly. This will only give them a bloody nose. Flesh can not mold flesh. Marriage is a defining thing, it is a sanctifying thing. But the deep work is not done by the spouse.
I have oftened long to be able to evoke change, through my actions, words, lifestyle, personal taste, guidance, and encouragement. But in reality true change comes from one source, Life. And there is only one true source of life and that is Christ.
The gift of marriage is about surrender, surrendering oneself to Christ. In many ways it is meant to do what the law did for the Israelites, reveal the depth of their depravity apart from Christ. In the closest willful relationship on earth that can exist between two people both fallen and heavenly attidues and cords of the heart will rise.
God said when he created man that "it was not good for man to be alone"-Genesis 2:18. And he chose not to create friendship to solve the problem of aloness but marriage. Adam walked and talked with God, what he was lacking in his life was not conversation or guideance, he had the creator of the universe at his disposal! But what he lacked was companionship, some with skin on to enjoy and delight in.
I've known this mentally for years, that my role as a woman is not to be God's mouth or God's tool of change; but rather to be God's servant. But I feel as if this truth is going deeper in me as I realize, flesh can not mold flesh.
I love Mary's response to the angel of the Lord when she find out she will carry the Messiah, Luke 1:38 "I am the Lord's servant". She had the heart of a wife and Godly woman.
You can not give another person a nose job by jabbing their nose repeatedly. This will only give them a bloody nose. Flesh can not mold flesh. Marriage is a defining thing, it is a sanctifying thing. But the deep work is not done by the spouse.
I have oftened long to be able to evoke change, through my actions, words, lifestyle, personal taste, guidance, and encouragement. But in reality true change comes from one source, Life. And there is only one true source of life and that is Christ.
The gift of marriage is about surrender, surrendering oneself to Christ. In many ways it is meant to do what the law did for the Israelites, reveal the depth of their depravity apart from Christ. In the closest willful relationship on earth that can exist between two people both fallen and heavenly attidues and cords of the heart will rise.
God said when he created man that "it was not good for man to be alone"-Genesis 2:18. And he chose not to create friendship to solve the problem of aloness but marriage. Adam walked and talked with God, what he was lacking in his life was not conversation or guideance, he had the creator of the universe at his disposal! But what he lacked was companionship, some with skin on to enjoy and delight in.
I've known this mentally for years, that my role as a woman is not to be God's mouth or God's tool of change; but rather to be God's servant. But I feel as if this truth is going deeper in me as I realize, flesh can not mold flesh.
I love Mary's response to the angel of the Lord when she find out she will carry the Messiah, Luke 1:38 "I am the Lord's servant". She had the heart of a wife and Godly woman.
Wednesday, June 01, 2011
Pictures
I spent the afternoon with a great friend yesterday snapping photos of Sierra and sharing life. I am continually amazed by the people God has seen fit to place in my life to encourage, strengthen, and challenge me.
Working from home with a five month old does not leave much room in the schedule for outings, another way my life has changed since Sierra came. No more quick trips to the cities and it seems like no trips at all without planning and packing! So the afternoon was a coffee sipping blessing as we both marveled at life and how it changes.
On another note, I can not coupon! I am trying to be an organized home wife with the blogs and coupons and freebies, but it is too hard! I work from home and stare at a computer hours everyday for work. Now I have to plan my grocery list from a blog...oh whoa to me! To all of you who clip and save and click and save, Hats Off, Cheers, a Toast to your success; but I will not be joining your club anytime soon. I will just stare longing at your receipts and your "amount saved" section and sigh and say "maybe someday".
Working from home with a five month old does not leave much room in the schedule for outings, another way my life has changed since Sierra came. No more quick trips to the cities and it seems like no trips at all without planning and packing! So the afternoon was a coffee sipping blessing as we both marveled at life and how it changes.
On another note, I can not coupon! I am trying to be an organized home wife with the blogs and coupons and freebies, but it is too hard! I work from home and stare at a computer hours everyday for work. Now I have to plan my grocery list from a blog...oh whoa to me! To all of you who clip and save and click and save, Hats Off, Cheers, a Toast to your success; but I will not be joining your club anytime soon. I will just stare longing at your receipts and your "amount saved" section and sigh and say "maybe someday".
Monday, May 30, 2011
Life as I know it....
My baby girl is growing more every day, learning to sit up, roll over, eat sweet potatoes, and giggle. She is not walking yet, or talking in complete sentences. She still is not potty trained. She has had 5 months on this earth and has changed and grown so much. I do not wish she was farther along then she is, I love this stage, the sweet cuddles, the gooey kisses, and the excitement she has over every new discovery.
I have walked with the Lord and desired to do his will for several years now, I am not perfect, I still stumble, I still often need something to hold on to when I walk on my own, and I still need support and encouragement often. Yet I believe that God as a father, delights in where I am at, because I am growing, reaching and longing for more. He loves to help me discover new things and delights and watching me celebrate little victories. This is an encouragement to my soul, on days I long to be further along, I see Sierra and remember God delights in where I am at and I will not be there forever.
I have walked with the Lord and desired to do his will for several years now, I am not perfect, I still stumble, I still often need something to hold on to when I walk on my own, and I still need support and encouragement often. Yet I believe that God as a father, delights in where I am at, because I am growing, reaching and longing for more. He loves to help me discover new things and delights and watching me celebrate little victories. This is an encouragement to my soul, on days I long to be further along, I see Sierra and remember God delights in where I am at and I will not be there forever.
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